Today I need to share with you what is going on in my mom life. See, my 2 year old has neuroblastoma. Right now we are cancer free, hopefully we’ll stay like that. My post is not about that though, is more about how we as parents deal with it, with illness. For me, it has been a process of spoiling my baby and trying to give him everything he wants. And this is hard. As he is quickly entering the terrible 2s.

I worry about EVERYTHING with him, that he is not eating, I worry when he doesn’t respond to his name, and when he is drowsy or hyper. A booboo in his arm or a bump in his head are things that keep me awake. I stare at him and marvel at the beauty of this tiny person who I carried for 9 months and whose time with me, might be limited. I try to savor every kiss and every hug.

Yesterday I posted on Facebook the story of Larry and his daughter Savvy. She was 2 years old and she went to bed and didn’t wake up. He made me think about having my boy still with me. I think of his stolen moments and try to have as many moments as I can, because you never know.

Our time is so short here and sometimes we, as parents, take that for granted. We get so busy making schedules for playdates, classes (gym, zoo, karate, music), we over-schedule birthday parties, we take thousands of pictures, yet we forget to live the moment. To savor every second that we possibly can with these little people who in an instant are going to be off to college, married, with kids of their own! It might sound like I’m exaggerating, but that’s how I feel. Every day is a gift more valuable and more precious than any big house, expensive car, or hefty bank account. Life is the most valuable gift we have.

You might ask why I’m thinking about this. Well today my baby decided to play and bumped his head in a table. It was such a small accident. And when I saw him I broke down. I re-lived every moment in the hospital with him. He got a bump in his head and I acted like he had fallen of a building. I don’t know how to explain it other than I am terrified. I am terrified of having those moments taken away from me.

So if anything I just want to help you stop and think. Think about slowing down. Enjoy the ride, the moments, the hugs and the kisses. You can always make up a missed music class, but you can never make up time with your kids.